Fun With Fast Food: Bagel Edition

So, I’ve been wondering what to do with this blog space for a while, and I’ve made up my mind. Over the past few years, I’ve been trying to segregate all of my different interests across several websites and blogs. At one point or another I’ve had:

  • a humorous daddy blog
  • a comics blog where I drew comic strips
  • a book blog
  • God knows how many “I’m going to lose weight. No, really, I mean it this time” blogs.
  • and that’s not even including all the various humorous blogs I’ve published anonymously, testing new grounds and such

In trying to do too many things in too many places, I’ve found myself not wanting to stick with any of them.

So, here’s what I’m going to do.

I’m going to post EVERYTHING here. 

You’re going to get a mish-mash of stuff, ranging from stuff I’m interested in, interviews with other creatives (I LOVE interviewing people I’m fascinated by), my occasional rants, my comic strips when I draw them, musings on pop culture (TV, games, movies, music, whatever), and stuff about being a dad. I’ll still post stuff at Collective Inkwell specific to the books, but I will link to it from here.

So, with that in mind, here’s a very important post*

and by important, I mean a meaningless post about something I got in the drive-thru lane.



bagel with way too much butter
Go ahead – click it to see it in all its buttery glory!

I ordered a toasted everything bagel with butter at a certain donut place yesterday morning.

And this is what they gave me.


How much butter do you think I fucking need?

I’m not sure if this picture really does the amount of butter justice. But it was a lot!

Looking at the caloric information on the company’s website, it shows the Everything bagel as being 340 calories and 3 grams of fat.

I’m guessing that’s without the optional POUND OF BUTTER, though.

Mmm, butter.
Mmm, butter.

Now, I don’t want to go off on a tangent about this particular donut place, because of all the fast food places I frequent, they’re one of the few who actually get shit right nine times out of 10. Unlike McDonald’s, which I could devote an entire blog to and never fully reach the depths of my hatred for the ineptitude on display.

Seriously, how hard is it to remember to put a burger patty in a hamburger? It’s in the NAME OF THE thing you’re making!! 

And the people who work at the donut place are always cool with me and my family, so no rants, no complaints.

I just wanted to post a photo and ask, WTF?

Here’s how much butter came off when I scraped it from the bagel (photo to the left).

Again, not sure if this close-up photo does the amount of butter justice.

Perhaps I should’ve taken the photo of the butter beside a recognizable landmark, such as the Lincoln Memorial or something, though it would be difficult to get a mountain of butter to Washington D.C. this time of year.

See you tomorrow with another post about something.

Thank you for reading,


5 thoughts on “Fun With Fast Food: Bagel Edition

Add yours

  1. You crack me up. I have the same problem with cream cheese on a bagel. The cream cheese I get on a bagel can last me 3 days at least.

  2. So having to scrape butter off meant it could be classed as fast food anymore?
    In cloudy South Derbyshire, England, we don’t have those problems. It’s more too many chicken and kebab fast food shops. Not sure if we have any bagel fast food shops out in the villages, that’s more a big city thing. Dave, you will to ask Gareth on the next SPP. Gives you an excuse to hear his voice, though I think he hams it up just for you.

    1. You mean all Brits don’t sound as sexy as Gareth? Oh, you’re ruining it for me!

      As for fast food, I’m not sure we have many kabob places, but plenty of McDonald’s and the like.

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